NOBODY LIKES CONFRONTATION.
Well, almost nobody. There are some people that actually desire confrontation. Me, I shy away from it. God then took me through a season of showing me places that I should have spoken up, but I didn’t. I should have brought correction and instruction and instead shied away, hoping the situation would correct itself. It didn’t. It rarely does. I’m probably a lot like most people, I just want to get along and have others like me. I’ve entertained gossip when I should have confronted it. I’ve listened to lies when I should have confronted it with the truth. I’ve allowed disruptive conversations and divisive actions continue when I should have put an end to them.
I allowed bad behavior when I should have confronted it with the truth. There’s a balance between being a coward and a bully. A saint is not called to be cowardly, this is fear-based. One of the scariest Scriptures is found in Jesus’ words in Revelation that the “cowardly” are thrown into the lake of fire. This makes me shutter. We are also not called to be a bully; this is pride based. However, no matter what anyone tells you, loving correction and instruction in righteousness is not bullying. It’s called being a friend. Scripture teaches the following:
“Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.” Colossians 4:6
“With or in grace” to show we are governed by the Holy Spirit, our soul is under the care of Jesus and bear His fruit in our life and words. “Seasoned with salt” as a preservative, we are free from corruption and full of wisdom; we cling to what is good and abhor what is evil, that you may give an answer to the ignorant and the scoffer.
Paul’s letter to the Romans reveals why the wrath of God comes against the unrighteous: they suppress the truth, profess to be wise, and exchange the truth for a lie. (Read Romans 1) Men initially suppress the truth then exchange that truth for lie. When we are silent in the face of sin, we suppress the truth. Then we exchange it for lie when we lead people to believe that God is pleased with them. The Lord tells us that we can only be true followers if we are in accordance with the Holy Spirit and in truth:
“But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him. God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.””
John 4:23-24 NKJV
Do you truly love people? Or has your love grown cold like the majority of the church? The very fact that they forsake the gathering displays a lack of true love. If you love your friend, you would tell them the truth and not suppress it. We say in our house, “don’t think about what will happen if you have the conversation; think about what will happen if you do not”.
You are accountable to the Lord for everything you say and everything you do not say. Clear and truthful communication is vital to any good relationship and to the unity of a community. Superficial relationships are not God’s intentions for His people. Sweeping bad behavior under the rug is not loving. If you cannot confront a “friend” on their sin, then you are not really a friend.
To Learn More About Pastor Crystal please visit the Leadership Page