CRY OUT TO HIM from your heart. Years ago, my husband sent me an article from a pastor writing about how the pastor’s wife is the toughest position in the church body. I identified with most things this man said. My husband and kids are talked about more than any other. My husband is never respected outside the church, and often never respected inside the church.

I read another article titled: “Pastoral Ministry: a Sure Way to be Dishonored”. The enemy loves to attack the head and the easiest way to attack the man of God is to attack his bride. I feel the weight of the ministry, as my husband does; but I also get the scorn from others who do not believe in women ministers. My husband and I have both received numerous hate emails, texts and phone calls. I have been attacked for buying a new pair of shoes, since apparently I’m only allowed to wear old ones with holes in the them. I feel alone most of the time.

I have tried to have relationships with other pastor’s wives, but most are not full time ministers as I am along side my husband. I feel misunderstood most of the time. I am almost always unfairly judged. I am expected to be at every event, and I try but am not able. I feel the pain of separation when people leave the congregation after professing their undying devotion to us.

My family has been lied about more times than I can count. I have to continually keep my heart soft and my head hard. I have ministering gifts as well. As a prophet, I feel the burden for the church. As a teacher, I feel the burden of the Word. I struggle with physical infirmities. Talk about me and I can handle it, but talk about my husband and kids, hurt them in any way, and you will get a mama bear.

Why do I tell you all this? Because my life is not and has not always been easy. Maybe you can relate? But I serve a God that can handle all my pain and suffering. He took on Himself my infirmities. He goes with me and I am never alone. I love my life because He has transformed my heart and transferred me into His kingdom. I am a child of God. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I have learned to kiss the wave that throws me against the Rock of salvation. I welcome trials and afflictions because His strength is made perfect in my weakness. I can enjoy life to the fullest because of His sacrifice. Your life may not be easy, but it can be a life of righteous, peace and joy when you cry out to Jesus from your heart.

“They did not cry out to Me with their heart When they wailed upon their beds. “They assemble together for grain and new wine, They rebel against Me;” Hosea‬ ‭7‬:‭14

Do not complain and cry out to others who cannot help you. If I’ve learned anything from the Psalms, it is to cry out to the Lord. He is my only help in times of trouble, my source of joy in times of sorrow, my origin of healing in times of pain.

When no one else understands, my Savior understands. When no one else cares, my Savior cares. When no one else will listen, He will. When you feel alone and like everyone has turned against you and abandoned you; He will never leave you. Cry out to Him from your heart. And for the rest, pray for those who despitefully use you, forgive those who hurt you and bless those who spread lies about you. Walk as He walked. Be perfect as He is perfect.


To Learn More About Pastor Crystal please visit the Leadership Page

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