Don’t kill your son

1 Sam 14:24-46 Don’t kill your son

  • I really identify with this story- Both with the relationship I’ve had with my father, and the relationship I’ve had with my son. I wont dishonor my father by over speaking it- but it hasn’t been what I hoped it to be
  • There have been times when I have had to apologize to my son for my conduct and the battle within has always been the pride of admitting that I was wrong and I need his forgiveness
  • This is the sin of pride that we see within Saul today and his son Jonathan- it goes far.
  • v44 Saul answered, “God do so and more also; for you shall surely die, Jonathan.”
  • What led up to this: Saul making an oath to fast and forcing everyone else to do it- it wasn’t of God- he’s not a priest. His son didn’t hear the oath- just wanted strength- Sauls pride wont let him admit fault- so he decides that he’s going to kill his own son rather than admit his faulty fast.

The Contributing factors to a life of Pride

  • Lack of Wisdom– Saul wanted to protect his kingship and his influence and to get vengeance
  • Proverbs 11:2 When pride comes, then comes shame; But with the humble is wisdom.
  • Self reliance– Saul wanted to be seen as the victor- not God
  • Haughty Spirit- Saul refused to go back on what he said- didn’t want to lose face
  • He should have just humbled himself and admit he was wrong! But it was PRIDE
  • As we progress through 1 SAM we will see Sauls fall and destruction. We’re not even into yet
  • Signs of Pride in a persons life- 1 Being a know it all- you have nothing to learn 2. Thinking you’re above performing a task 3. Unwilling to ask for help 4. Constantly teaching people in conversation 5. Always talking about yourself 6. Thinking you’re better than others 7. Not listening to others sound advice. 8. Always critical 9. Constant need for attention and affirmation 10. Cant take criticism 11 Worried about appearance 12. Unwilling to submit to authority 13. Justification of Sin instead of repentance 14. Name dropping 15. Harsh spirit
  • How many of those just touched your heart? How much pride do you have your heart that needs to be removed and brought before the Lord?
  • The biggest problem with Pride is that it is the root of the sins of Gal 5:20 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies
  • This isn’t Pride as in “I’ve worked hard to have a nice lawn- look at it” it’s the pride of “I don’t have anything wrong with me and I’m better than others and you better not confront me”
  • Pride takes credit for what you didn’t do (it was God), looks down on others, ignores reality, creates relational problems, minimizes sin, elevates the self, gives God no glory, and is sour
  • Pride is killing your relationships with others. Your pride is keeping you from seeking forgiveness from sins. Some of you know God is real and your PRIDE keeps you from repenting

How To not Kill your Son (and kill your pride)

  1. Be Honest with yourself
  • The sin of Pride was evident with Saul because he refused to be honest with himself and others. He wouldn’t have to have killed his son if he didn’t make the false oath and even after he did repent (like me with my son and the admitting of fault)
  • READ V 37-39 God Doesn’t even answer Saul when he asked, and instead of looking for the sin in his own life, he starts looking at the sin of OTHERS
  • This is a sign of dishonesty within yourself- when you look at the sin of others instead of yourself- Pride always looks for the problems everywhere except within themselves
  • Proverbs 16:5 Everyone proud in heart is an abomination to the Lord; Though they join forces, none will go unpunished.
  • Why couldn’t Saul look inside himself and just be honest? Dang it- I shouldn’t have said that guys- that wasn’t God- that was me- I’m sorry- PRIDE PRIDE PRIDE
  • Self reflection is the key to seeing pride in your life- Its scary to find the pride in your heart
  • When something is wrong in your life- don’t start looking at what others are doing to you, look at what you’re doing to yourself- what have you contributed to the issue? YOUR PRIDE
  • I know this- I want to be respected. When I feel like someone disrespects me you will see me flare- made a mistake in the roundabout- Yelling at the lady flipping me off
  • Proverbs 21:4 A haughty look, a proud heart, And the plowing of the wicked are sin.
  • But you gotta look at yourself- You have to be honest with yourself- what is really going on?
  • Watching Navy Seal fighter- how to win every street fight you encounter video- walk away
  • What does it mean to you?
  • Are you being honest with yourself about the pride in your heart?
  • Psalm 26:2 Examine me, O Lord, and prove me; Try my mind and my heart.
  • Honesty can only come through the power of the Holy Spirit- to show you yourself
  • Pride doesn’t always manifest itself externally. I know there are prideful people that are outwardly loving, caring, and kind. But the seeds of pride run deep. Work, parenting, ministry
  • I was hard on my young children because I cared too much what other people thought about me
  • Romans 12:3 For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.
  • How do you think about yourself? Are you unable to admit your faults? Unable to be honest about your true desires in your heart? Unable to look at how you contribute to your folly?
  • How special do you think you really are? Have you puffed yourself up to the point of pride?
  • 1 Corinthians 13:4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
  1. Don’t play Games
  • God does not like pride in his people
  • Why? Because he is supposed to be the focus- not US.
  • Its not about our plans, our position, our ideas, our real estate. We exist to exhalt HIM
  • Sauls heart was supposed to be for Israel, not for his own ideas and plans
  • Read V 41-44 The part of this story which shows so much pride is the switcharoo that Saul does- No focus on him, all the focus on the blood eating- the ‘casting of lots’ in this story is to determine the sin in the camp (the blood not the jonathan thing) so they cast lots, and it separates Saul and Jon
  • Proverbs 18:12 Before destruction the heart of a man is haughty, And before honor is humility.
  • Saul was hoping the sin would be on the people- but it landed on them- and he pushes Jon out
  • The weaving of pride throughout relationship is an attempt to hide your own pride
  • Everyone focus on THAT don’t focus on ME- THEY are WRONG- just don’t focus on ME
  • You can fool men- but you can’t fool God- he saw the Pride in Saul- Hes going to lose
  • Psalm 73:6 Therefore pride serves as their necklace; Violence covers them like a garment.
  • What does it mean to you?
  • Luke 18:9-14 READ
  • This story from Jesus illustrates so clearly the game playing that people do within their hearts
  • Man one- I am better than others. I do better. I act better. I am in a right place
  • Man two- I get everything wrong. I just need the grace of God
  • Which one are you? Jesus says the second man is the one that he wants not the first man
  • You can play games with men all day long- but don’t play games with God- stay humble!
  • You have to constantly be self reflecting to find that sin of pride
  • Psalm 139: 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; 24 And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting.
  • Jesus made it clear- Matthew 23:12 And whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.
  1. Lift up others at your expense
  • Saul’s heart of pride kept him from lifting up his own son. HIS OWN SON
  • He should have just admitted fault. Gone to Israel and said- “I was wrong. Jonathan just ate some honey to win the battle- lets celebrate him and afterwards we can all eat some meat”
  • He should have thanked Jonathan for finding the honey that God had provided.
  • Romans 12:16 Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
  • What does it mean to you?
  • Rom 12:16- Come from the assumption that you’re usually wrong- start there-
  • Seek first to understand- ‘have I done something wrong to you’?
  • And if you have- APOLOGIZE and STOP DOING IT
  • Philippians 2:3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.
  • Think about the value of others more than you think about the value of yourself
  • Let other people sing your praises, you don’t need to sing your own- no one likes it
  • Lift up other people. Boost them up. Encourage them- be there for them
  • 10 times cooler- the rule of the college kid
  • Remember- in the end times- pride is in the root of it
  • 2 Timothy 3:2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
  • The most important pride you want to look for is the pride of keeping your self from repentance-
  • If you’re a believer- a sin you refuse to admit and turn from
  • If you’re not a believer- refusing to admit you need a savior- repent now from your pride
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